My Beloved Bulimia

My beloved Bulimia,

After all these years I now know that I can no longer live with you in my life, I can no longer go on living my life thinking of what will happen next, what will I consume next? I no longer want to feel the undesired urge you fill me with as soon as I take every bite, please I do not wish to lie to you anymore but I cannot fake this either. For many years I used to think what would become of me if my best friend left, what would be left of me? Would there be any part of me left? Would I even be me? All these questions have been going through my head and I think I am finally done asking and just want to find out, whatever that may bring the answer to be.

My friend, I do not wish to anger you so please understand I no longer wish to continue this friendship and since you have left me no choice, I choose to begin this battle against you. My most beloved friend, I loved you as a part of me up until now, I let you grow up with me, I brought you into my life, I let you into my home, my family. I thought we would grow old and we would share many memories together but now I know that after all these years our friendship was as toxic as they come. You endanger my future, you make me have secrets, secrets I no longer wish to keep, you keep me in control and now you may pose a threat to my children I wish to bear so hope that you understand that I can no longer welcome or accept you.

I want you to know that I don’t hate you, I don’t blame you, I will never tell others that I battled with you my entire life because my dearest friend, I did not battle against you for all these years, I embraced you. I embraced what you had to offer, I embraced the happy and sad times we had, I did not fight you but now I will have to, if not for me but for my future.

Yours Truly,

Ex Best Friend.